Things are still tense and uncertain at work. Those of us at my small satellite office feel that something is going to happen, but we don’t know what. This week, a couple of my co-workers saw a small group of people walking around and taking measurements and pictures of our rented office space! My co-workers asked them who they were and were told that they were from Facilities Management [which represents the corporation that owns the building] and nothing more. Really!?!
It’s horrible working with a sword over our heads. We’ve had a handful of people jump ship voluntarily in the last week or so. I’m so worried that I may lose my job (and health benefits) before I can have this surgery and before I can build up an emergency fund.
There is a sliver of hope in this. Our company does have another office space in the city where I work. There is a possibility that we could be moved other there. Maybe? … Kinda? … Sigh.
Ok, so there are three ways that this plays out:
1. I keep my job and everything stays the same. Everything that’s happened is all a coincidence. (Blue pill, anyone?)
2. I keep my job along with some/most/all others of us who are left in our office and we are relocated to another company building across town.
3. I lose my job along with some/most/all others in our office space. If anyone survives, they are relocated across town.
So there! That must mean I have a greater than 65% chance of keeping my job, right? Maybe?! … Kinda?! …Sigh. Ok, ok, I’m being facetious with my ‘calculation’, but I need to find a reason to smile. And it sort of feels like I’m in a game of chance right now. Most people at work are worried that it is their job category that’s going to get cut. So we are trying to re-assure each other as much as we can.
I’m taking a look at several job boards. What’s out there right now is not very impressive; way too many contract openings and not enough permanent positions. And for what jobs that are available, I’ll be competing against many younger workers with fresh new degrees and cutting edge skills. My skills have atrophied since I graduated. I have a lot of training to do to get my skills up to date.
I used to have recruiters contacting me every so often. A few months ago, I had 4 really big name places want to get me in to interview with them. I turned them all down. Two of the roles were too senior level for me and wouldn’t have been a good fit. For the other two, I was just afraid of change. I was afraid I’d bomb the interview (I’ve done that before), or worse yet, get the job and then fail at it and get fired (ditto). Maybe I should have applied for those positions when I had the chance. In recent weeks, I haven’t heard a peep from any recruiters. Hiring usually ramps up in starting in April (2nd Quarter), so maybe things are just in a lull and I’ll see more openings soon. Let’s hope. Maybe this is a sign that I need to move on.
Ahh, another reason to hate debt. If I didn’t have that blasted credit card debt and instead had $30,000 sitting in my bank account, I’d be totally relaxed right now. If I got axed, I’d bank my severance pay and probably take some time to travel. Maybe I’d teach English in another country for a year and live life. Who knows? The point is, I’d have options. Right now, I’m broke and at someone else’s mercy…. again. I hate this…
Ok, enough of my blathering. I need to get to the job boards. I really, really don’t like interviewing and being on the job market, but I can’t sit back and wait for who knows what to happen. My lesson for today: If you have a secure job, even if you don’t like it, be grateful for it. …And get out of debt!